6 Cocktails That Get The Job Done

by Laura Aussenberg

Do you ever miss the good ol' days in college when you could walk up to a pledge-run bar and have them serve you from a trough of Everclear-infused jungle juice? While you probably won't be able to get a red Solo cup full of pink panty droppers at your favorite bar, there are a few cocktails you can order that still get the job done. Make sure you have your designated driver lined up because after a few of these concoctions, you're definitely not going to be able to think straight...hopefully. 

1. Zombie
After a glass or two of this mean cocktail, you'll have a better understanding of how it got its name, and  you might not remember yours.

1/2 oz. White Rum
1 1/2 oz. Golden Rum
1 oz. Dark Rum
1/2 oz. 151-Proof Rum
1 oz. Lime Juice
1 tsp. Pineapple Juice
1 tsp. Papaya Juice

2. Long Island Iced Tea
Don't let this cocktail's mellow name fool you. There's a reason this iced tea doesn't come with free refills. That's because its lack of mixer leaves you with a drink that really packs a punch. Feeling bold? You can order yours "extra long" if you want to amp the alcohol.

1/2 oz. Triple Sec
1/2 oz. Light Rum
1/2 oz. Gin
1/2 oz. Vodka
1/2 oz. Tequila
1 oz. Sour Mix

3. Boilermaker
Think of this drink as a manlier alternative to a sake bomb. All you do is drop your shot of whiskey into a glass of beer and drink on up. If you'd rather take it as a shot, you can order a beer and a bump instead. Simply down your shot and then wash it down with your brew.

4. Irish Car Bomb
You don't have to wait around for St. Patty's Day to down a glass of this potent cocktail. The shot and beer combo results in an explosive mixture that will take the edge off in no time. Bombs away!

1/2 oz. Irish Cream
1/2 pint Irish Stout
1/4 oz. Irish Whiskey
1/4 oz. Coffee Liqueur

5. Adios Motherf***er
Not only do you get to curse at the bartender with your drink order, you also get the privilege of saying goodbye to your soberness one delicious sip at a time-or gulp. Adios!

1/2 oz. Vodka
1/2 oz. Rum
1/2 oz. Tequila
1/2 oz. Gin
1/2 oz. Blue Curacao Liqueur
2 oz. Sweet & Sour Mix
2 oz. 7-Up Soda

6. Aunt Roberta
Some deem this absinthe-based cocktail "the strongest drink in the world," and if you can keep it down, you're on your way to having a pretty wild night. Bottoms up!

2 oz. Absinthe 
3 oz. Vodka
1 oz. Brandy
1.5 oz. Gin
1 oz. Blackberry Liqueur

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