J-a-e-g-u-r? : The Drunken Spelling Bee

July 15, 2008 3:07 PM
by Marcos Colón [email]

Spelling bees conjure up many memories for me, none of them good. It reminds me of the second grade spelling bee I failed miserably; bright lights, soccer mom paparazzi snapping pictures and fellow classmates waiting for me to slip up so they can get a little bit closer to spelling glory. But Purdy Lounge’s drunken spelling bee made me realize what my elementary school spelling bee was lacking: Jägermeister. If I had downed a few shots of the thick German firewater before stepping onto my school’s stage, maybe I wouldn’t have botched the word “badge” (with it’s cruelly placed silent “d”).

Thankfully, Purdy Lounge offers me a second chance at fulfilling my spelling dreams. The format is much more casual than the average spelling bee (the host won’t define the word or use it in a sentence), but don’t allow the spelling bee’s carefree nature to lull you into a false sense of security; the words can get pretty tricky. Expect some stiff competition in the form of alcoholic librarians vying for victory (and the coveted $50 bar tab awarded to the champion). If your lack of sobriety results in a spelling slip up, don’t despair: a misspelled word won’t result in immediate disqualification, you’ll just wind up in a second elimination round. To add to the difficulty, progressing to the next round also includes and obligatory shot of Jägermeister (which may cripple your spelling abilities). Each round even has a theme for the spelling debauchery. The first round of July’s spelling bee consisted solely of words taken from Wu Tang lyrics, complete with a DJ spinning and scratching their tracks.

If you weren’t blessed with the gift of perfect spelling, do not despair. Getting sloshed at Purdy Lounge is as easy as a Sunday morning. In another attempt to associate childhood memories with drunken debauchery, Purdy Lounge offers a $6 “Happy Meal,” consisting of a Jäger shot and a bottle of Miller High Life. They also offer old school board games like Connect Four if you’re too buzzed to dance or spell.

If you are looking to battle the Sunday night blues, why not recreate the carefree days of Happy Meals and spelling bees with drunken spelling bees and alcoholic happy meals? Just try not to slur your letters too much or it will be like the second grade all over again.

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