CoolJunkie Looks Back at DJ AM

September 8, 2009 2:00 PM
by Pete Tremblay

"New York, New York. Big city of dreams, but everything in New York ain’t always what it seems." – These, the final public words from Adam Goldstein, better known as DJ AM, were burned with such foreboding permanence into the memories of fans and friends alike via Twitter on the 25th of August, 2009. Three days later after local authorities broke down the door to his Lafayette St. apartment in New York City; Goldstein was found DOA shirtless and alone. Officially the cause of death was deemed an accidental drug overdose. A crack pipe was found near the body.

DJ AM’s 36 years had come to a close after a childhood of abuse and addiction, but more importantly a 16-year musical career, coming of age in one of the most difficult scenes imaginable, ultimately leaving a legacy of innovation, celebrity, and kindness in his wake.

Getting his introduction to the music business in his early 20’s, DJ AM would gain notoriety by DJing for the rock band Crazy Town in the late 90’s. Although his music career was beginning to gain steam, Goldstein’s early 20’s were plagued by crack cocaine addiction. Fueled by memories of childhood abuse from his father and growing up in a shattered home, the pressure and depression culminated in a failed suicide attempt just as his career was beginning to take off. DJ AM Told People Magazine in a 2008 interview, “At 24 I felt like my life was over, I went into my living room, reached into a cabinet above my TV and grabbed my gun, a loaded .22," Goldstein then 34, admitted. "I sat back on my heels, cocked it and put it into my mouth. I pulled the trigger. The gun didn't go off. I thought, 'Are you kidding me? I'm such an [expletive] failure I can't even kill myself?’ I dropped the gun and broke down. That was the turning point in my life.”

Shortly after, hungry for something more than a life of addiction, depression and over indulgent living, Goldstein got into rehab, cleaned up and lost 155 lbs (with the help of gastric bypass surgery). Goldstein’s sobriety was always a very emotionally challenging and heavy weight upon his shoulders once stating, “At any given moment, I'm five seconds away from walking up to someone, grabbing their drink out of their hand and downing it. And if I do that, within a week, tops, I’ll be smoking crack.”

DJ AM’s 11-year stint of sobriety would come to a screeching halt reportedly as a result of a dependency on anti-anxiety meds prescribed to Goldstein after his nearly fatal 2008 Learjet crash in South Carolina a year ago where he and Blink 182 Drummer Travis Barker were the only survivors. The re-introduction of intoxicants in his body reportedly was too much for the recovering addict, causing the relapse that would ultimately bring a tragic end to Goldstein’s career and life.

A Tragic Loss for EDM

DJ AM was a staple and innovator for EDM for more than a decade. DJ AM got his start with Pop/Rock/Electronic fusion band Crazy Town, but after breakthrough hit “Butterfly” lost its chart topping position Crazy Town disbanded. On the heals of his Pop success, Goldstein held a one year residency at one of the largest clubs in Las Vegas, Club Pure in Caesar’s Palace. The high profile residency fueled DJ AM’s popularity among celebrities garnering Invites from Hollywood’s social Elite to spin at their private parties, opening the door to collaborations with Madonna among others. This introduced him to Celebrity status as DJ AM began dating numerous starlets and Socialites such as Nicole Ritchey and Mandy Moore, however DJ AM’s legacy has always been defined by the music which he shared with the world.

Most recently DJ AM opened club LAX in Los Angeles and soon to be opened Club Dusk in Atlantic City. Goldstein along with international DJ Steve Aoki also founded DECKSTAR Management which hosts some of the most prominent DJ’s in the industry today. DJ AM also contributed heavily towards the first ever interactive EDM turntable videogame “DJ HERO.” At the time of publication, it is currently unknown as to the future of DECKSTAR management or the recently opened nightclubs to which DJ AM owns.

There is one thing however that remains certain. The world of dance music has lost one of its most talented, humblest and most giving DJ’s with the death of Adam “DJ AM” Goldstein. Celebrities, fans and friends alike will be morning his life and legacy for a long time to come.